Do You Believe in Monsters?

Painting of a monster

This is the best time of the year to talk about monsters.

When I was a little fellow, at that tender age when I was not quite sure where babies came from, my grandfather used to entice me to stay longer at his place by telling me stories about witches and aliens and local monsters.

He would speak of ugly forest witches who stole hens from neighbours, and of lake monsters that swallowed fishermen’s skiffs, and of green aliens that kidnapped beautiful girls. I would listen with bated breath.

‘More, more! Tell me more!’

Later, when my mother came to take me home, I told her everything.

‘You sweet little fool! Your grandfather has deceived you again!’

‘You mean a forest witch hasn’t stolen his hen two nights ago?’

She laughed and said,

‘Your grandmother made good use of that hen. She made tasty soup with it!’

I sighed.

But when I went to bed and turned off the light, the stilly and mysterious night comforted me, and I was certain that as I was falling asleep, in some distant, unexplored corner of the world, a monster was awakening…

*

All ages had their monsters…

This one maybe has the ultimate monster. The human being.

*

Monsters have to exist, because through their unfriendliness they teach us to be more friendly. Also, by simulating danger, they make us appreciate our safety and our peace more.

It’s true that their bad manners are a bad example for kids. But most monsters have monstrous endings, and that teaches naughty boys an important lesson: look what happens when you misbehave…

*

I believe in charming monsters.

In those that eat people to survive, not that survive to eat people.

I believe in monsters that have distinctive traits and peculiar habits, that exist not only so they can be shot, stabbed, imploded, immolated, or blown up.

Those that have an elusive presence which stirs rumors and keeps their legend alive for centuries…

Yes, I believe in my compatriot Dracula and in all those charming monsters I’ve named above, although I have never seen them.

But I don’t believe in zombies.

 

49 thoughts on “Do You Believe in Monsters?

  1. All children’s stories were originally designed to scare children into playing nice. It’s when they all were softed down (it’s that even a word?) the values of the stories started disappearing. Nowadays we have teletubbies and other mindless crap that doesn’t learn your child anything, but acting like a moron and rolling over the floor screaming like a pig that’s being slaughtered is normal. Hahaha.

    It’s true though.

          1. WE ARE! We just don’t believe in brainwashing little children to be moronic monkeys. We like to focus on developing their brains. You know, play games, sing songs, etc. etc. No Barney, Teletubbies or Dora the Explorer (which learns them a little, but is mostly incredibly retarded)

            And about those “Myths”: You are right, this country is the most awesome country in the world! 😛

  2. Here it goes, a story from my past, that starts with…

    When I was a little girl…
    I believed in probably any possible mysterious being! I believed in witches, vampires, ghosts (those most of all), haunted houses and so on…
    I suppose that might have something to do with the enormous amount of scary story literature I read at that time… Somehow I loved spooky stories but then…I’d also be scared to death…
    To believe in vampires was more understandable after I saw a newspaper which front page presented a man’s face with vampire teeth and was entitled … I don’t remember the exact title but it was something with a real vampire being in town… That was in Toronto.

    Have a lovely day, Vinc!:)

    1. Vampires do exist!

      I have met one today: the woman with inky hair!

      (Not really. She is a nice person. But things didn’t go well. 😦 )

      Dear Julita, I am seriously considering the possibility of becoming a monk.

  3. I don’t believe in zombies either, but every time I get on the freeway, I tend to assume monsters are on it beside me, behind me, way off in the distance.

    Well, not too far in the distance, as I can still see them swerving from side to side.

  4. Thank goodness for the legends that tell us how to conquer the real life monsters – which are much more hideous! (On a different note, watch your inbox…something non monster like coming to you soon)…

      1. Well, of course a gallant hatted phebe, like you, would think so, but im unhatted , my laces are forever unlacing (seriously, no jokes about this one) and im as clumzy as a bee in a universe where the impossible is actually so.

  5. I like phantoms! Or at least the concept of them.
    Hadn’t heard of the Wandering Jew until today… Very curious indeed!
    And I remember reading a story as a seven-year old girl which made me fall in love with dragons. Eleven years on and I still have that book and read it time and again. Dragons are cute, silly and adorable! As are all monsters… Humans included. 🙂
    Happy Halloween, Vincent! Belated.

  6. I believe in the monster that hides in the id. I believe its cousin is ego. There is greed there in the bushes and temptation in the branches of the trees. Beeware and watch for the sting of dullness and the ache of the panacea to cure you.

  7. Hey! Great post! I feel that nowadays zombies are overrated. It is not “a monster thing” anymore, just a part of the culture. Silly one, too.
    As for me, I was facinated by the Golem of Prague. A simple story of how a tiny Jewish commune in the city of Prague was saved back in times. Hm, when I think about it doesn’t make any sense: I am not Jewish, I haven’t been in Prague.
    Oh well.

    1. I like the story about the Czech Golem as well, though I am not Jewish either.

      Another monster that’s near that one is the Wawel Dragon in Poland. He has his own cave. 🙂

  8. “In those that eat people to survive, not that survive to eat people.”

    Charming monsters, indeed. I believe in all kinds of monsters, misunderstood or not. I believe in zombies. They exist in a lot of places, those mindless creature, believe me. You see them and you also know they exist, you just don’t believe they do.

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